When I think of weddings, I imagine everything pretty–the dress, the shoes, the bouquet.
I have been on a roll in both Facebook and Instagram. I have been posting photos of my wedding DIY stuff. It has been all about the beautiful little details.
But when the night before our civil wedding came, reality hit me big time. It made me realise that the wedding is just a teeny tiny part of what lies ahead. It is just the pretty word that goes before the overwhelmingly messier term: Marriage.
Our civil wedding was going to be officiated in Zürich, Switzerland. Naturally, the DBF and I had to prepare for EVERYTHING. Unlike in the Philippines, there are no househelpers to assist us with the stuff we needed to fix before our wedding here in Europe. We are lucky that his mom is also based in Switzerland though. She helped us with the procurement of legal documents and she also volunteered to cook for our guests.
But the night before our wedding, the DBF and I together with our friend CLEANED our place. There was division of labor.
But take this:
“I, the bride-to-be, found myself scrubbing the bathroom tiles THE NIGHT BEFORE MY WEDDING!”
Sabi ko talaga sa sarili ko: “Ano ba ‘to? Kasal ko bukas pero ito ang ginagawa ko?!”
But while I was doing that arduous task, I smiled at God’s irony. I knew at that time exactly what He was making me remember before I say “I do!” —
That marriage is really not a bed of roses all the time. Most of the time, it’s about the obligations and responsibilities (like scrubbing toilets and vacuuming the floors).
In this age where we can filter photos and make everything look beautiful online, it is easy to forget the hardwork that comes along with building a strong relationship and ultimately, a formidable marriage offline.
When the hashtags get old and the couple is back from their honeymoon, daily chores and big decisions come rushing in like an avalanche.
It is easy to say your “I do” while imagining all the romantic surprises and the fun dates. And so when it was my turn to say it, I had to stop and think of the moment I was cleaning our place. I had to take a deep breath and ask myself, “Do you take the bad, the ugly, and the difficult, too, for as long as you both shall live?”
Well, I guess, if I can survive cleaning the toilet the night before my wedding, I can already take on anything! 😉
I blurted out a loud, excited, and convinced “I do!” that made everyone in the room laugh.
But deep down, I knew, and we all knew…that marriage is no laughing matter.